|Attitude (Photo credit: R Scott Photography)|
Loni Joy is a budding writer living in Noosa Heads loving the coast lifestyle ... last year I completed a Diploma of Screen/Media.
Learning how to dig yourself out of a hole
What do you do when things don't go according to plan? We all know life is so much better when things go our way, but what happens when things don't? How do you react? What happens for you?
Some believe there's only one way to go. Or is there?
Sure, we can go ... down. Bearing in mind a few very important questions need to be asked:
* How long do we stay there?
* How do we pull ourselves back up?
* What kind of self -talk do we engage in?
Do you tell yourself, "That's it, there will never be another opportunity/love/job like this?" Do you beat yourself up by saying, "I caused this, it's all my fault, nothing I ever do is right?"
Life keeps on keeping on and there's no greater opportunity to learn how to rise above adversity than by one's own experiences. These are my tips for taking control and digging yourself out of that proverbial hole:
* Self-talk is crucial at this point - take stock of the situation and be gentle with yourself.
* Life goes on. The wheel is always turning. What you miss out on today may well be yours tomorrow or up the track sometime.
* Resist the urge to play the situation up as catastrophic.
* Resist the urge to tell everyone about 'it' and talk about how 'unfair' it all is (this puts us into victim mode).
* Talk to someone you can trust - it's important to express yourself - but in a safe space and with a safe ear.
* Do something nice for yourself. None of us like disappointment but sometimes its just life. Go have a massage, a facial or get your nails done.
* Try to remember that this too shall pass. We can't see the entire pathway, we can only see the bit that's ahead of us.
* Hit the treadmill, a walking track or the pool. Join a dance class or try out boxing. Again, exercise is natures way of helping us deal with stress by increasing our feel good hormones!
You have to take some kind of action to dig yourself out of the disappointment hole. It won't disappear by itself.
There are lots of *small* things we can do to help re-frame our minds. Positive versus negative - it's our choice. It's all part of the wonderful adventure of life!
We are all faced with similar situations at various times of our lives. A dear friend of mine has a terminal illness. The way she faces each day is remarkable.
She knows her time is limited but she gets herself out of bed, puts her make up on, dresses like a million dollars and goes about her day (the fact that she has to get home by lunchtime most days to sleep the afternoon away is simply what she has to deal with).
She rarely complains, is very matter of fact about things and is an total inspiration. Her remarkable demeanour constantly reminds me that ... our attitudes really can be our friend or our foe.