Saturday, March 10, 2012

Do You Take Responsibility for Your Actions?

Who Needs Actions When You Got Words                                 Image via WikipediaBy Arthur Tassinello

It seems that no matter what happens in the world, whether it's in 'Your World' or the world around you, few of us take responsibility for what we do.

As an example Congress makes decisions that affect us everyday, yet when it comes to owning what they do and did they are always blaming outside forces.

It's always someone else's fault. I did my job, but someone else f%#! it up. The banks, the realtors, the economy, the corporations, the lobbyists, the President, and the list goes on, and on, and on.

It's way too easy to plead innocence, I tried, and "I was deceived". Yes people lie for many reasons, however each of us is a factor, and things just don't happen in a vacuum.

Blaming others, is this the way you want to act? With a reaction that usually puts the culpability in someone else's lap. Are you always going to play the victim? When do you finally own up to your part in this world (your world), in this life (your life)? Everyday you have a choice and those choices are all on you. No one can do anything to you, but I not sure that you get that.

Let's start with a really tough one. How about Bernie Madoff? Sure it's easy to see that he took advantage of many people, and manipulated and lied to get what he wanted. But weren't there signals along the way. You know the line of "If it's too good to be true it is too good to be true".

If we really got into the details of each case where someone invested with him there was probably a tell tale sign telling them that something was amiss. Of course, I know there are times when we are too trusting and innocent, however you made the choice and you need to take some responsibility for perhaps not doing a more thorough investigation, etc., etc.

Let's take a simpler case. You purchase a car and you sign all these leasing or loan documents, and you don't read all the fine print and you rely on the salesman to tell you what's in them. Then sometime down the road you realize that there is an early termination clause, you say, the salesman never reveled to you. Do you take responsibility for this, or do you go on about how he/she deceived you. Certainly it's easier to blame someone else than take responsibility isn't it.

In 2000 I decided to be a day trader. Things were going along very well for months, where I was making anywhere from a few hundred dollars a day and more. I thought I had the formula, but then the tech stock debacle happened, where over a weekend all tech stocks lost 50 to 90% of their value.

Yes, I lost everything and I was devastated. I cried, I kicked myself and I blamed Wall Street. Should I blame Wall Street? I could, I mean they did have a hand in it, but how was I responsible?

Well, first I didn't have enough day-trading experience! In hindsight I see that had I had more training, more knowledge, put in place some safeguards, not have been invested only in the tech sector and not have margined all of my holdings things could have been different. But they weren't and just like in the movie "Perfect Storm", I was as responsible as the other factors that led to my losses.

While we can debate these situations all day, my point is that we have choices and as the law states, "Ignorance of the law is no excuse". You see if you go to court pleading you didn't know and could get away with that, everyone would plead the same and then we wouldn't need the courts, would we.

If you haven't gotten the point, you are most likely a person who claims, "I'm a victim", most of the time, aren't you. We, you and I, have a brain and it is incumbent upon us to use it. There are no more "copouts" of "I was in a rush", or "she/he should have told me", or any other damn thing you can think of that excuses you from taking, at least, some responsibility.

I have my lessons and you have yours. Do you recognize them? Will you recognize them? Take a hard look at how you act, take ownership, understand your actions, forgive yourself and others, learn your lessons, and move on. Now use what you have learned to help yourself and others, continue to trust, take your time to think, and use caution. After all it is up to you, isn't it? Don't allow the "Perfect Storm" to get you!

Arthur Tassinello is an author, life coach and a motivational speaker from West Palm Beach, Florida. Arthur can help you break through and reach your goals by working with you one on one as your personal coach and mentor. You can find out more about his coaching services by going to: http://www.thecoffeehousecoach.com/life-coach/ Contact Arthur today so you can start living the life you have always dreamed of living.

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