Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Ciao, Auf Wiedersehen, Buona Sera: Saying Goodbye to Naysayers

WASHINGTON - JUNE 30:  U.S. President Barack O...Image by Getty Images via @daylifeBy Evelyn Kalinosky

"The good kind of friend
not only encourages
you to grow
and inspires you
to grow ~
the good kind of friend
makes you
believe you can grow."
~ Terri St. Cloud

I love Terri's poetry (that's her artwork, too)! What I particularly love about this piece is that "friend" can apply to a wealth of different people: a family member, an actual friend, a colleague, a spouse or partner, and someone we often forget about when we're thinking about friendship - ourselves.

While the individual may be different, what's the same is the support, the belief in you and in your ability to succeed, no matter how great the challenge. Wow! Think about that: what an amazing circle of light surrounds you at any given moment!

As a solo entrepreneur, one of the things I most look forward to each week is my accountability call with two of my mastermind sisters, each of whom are entrepreneurs in their own right. Every Monday we share what's going well in our businesses, what's not, what our plans and strategies are, and the steps we're putting into play to make them happen.

We laugh, ask questions, hold each other's feet to the fire, and give each other permission to, as my one colleague said on one of our last calls, feel "droopy." What a relief it is to know that we don't have to pretend to be positive or upbeat when we're feeling particularly blue. We have a place to let our bad hair day show, and in the process end up with some amazing suggestions on how to get over the funk once we're ready.

Now I realize that not everyone feels they have that kind of support. I know I didn't used to have it. Before I gave myself permission to create my best life, I was surrounded by quite a few people who were negative and controlling, who preferred to give me ten reasons why I couldn't succeed rather than one reason I would.

But here's the thing - we tend to draw to us what we mirror. We might be telling ourselves and the world that we want to be successful, but in that deep, dark place on the inside we're convinced we're not worthy of the effort.

And guess what kinds of people we'll draw to us then? You got it - the naysayers. Work through what's holding you back, however, and watch who begins to show up in your life; who will inspire you to grow like the amazing flower you are!

Whether you're a woman business owner or business woman, I'd love to know what you've done to rid yourself of negative, unsupportive people in your life. And if you haven't, what's holding you back? Let's dish and support one another - share you comments on my blog ...

As Founder & CEO of Inner Affluence, Evelyn specializes in helping midlife career women increase their sacred capital. For these women, the desire to play a bigger game requires a strong profit motive, but making money is no longer the goal. The goal is a search for significance, a journey to uncover the wealth of the self, a rite of passage to their highest purpose, and to a life that is as unique as their fingerprint.

Evelyn is currently writing a book about women navigating through midlife. She is a speaker, consultant, published author and poet. Visit her at:
"Increase Your Sacred Capital!"

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